Change and Love

When we broke up I knew we were different people, but only now, 6 months later am I seeing how much things have truly changed.
It’s no secret that break ups hurt. We’d grown up together and I didn’t see us growing apart, or rather I just didn’t want to see it. Once we were clear it had finally ended I wasn’t distraught, more confused on how to live my life without a constant companion. I had felt the distress in stages over the last year of our relationship, so I didn’t need to mourn when it ended. Or so I thought.
It wasn’t until I saw you again 4 months later that I really felt the twang of a broken heart that hadn’t quite healed calling out for love. But this time it wasn’t for you, because you were gone. The person I’d once known had died. Yes, really.
“I am never going to see them again” rang in my head when I heard you speak. You voice had changed, and not just your accent. There was emphasis on different words, slang you’d picked up from other places and other people. There were hints of the person long gone, but you new facade overpowered my mind. I hated you. You became everything I despised and crushed my buried feelings. Your mannerisms made me cringe, your hair had grown a way I didn’t like it. And that was the point I truly felt heartbroken.
That night I went home and burned everything I still had of yours; all the notes, cards and keep-sakes. I burned them whilst I mourned the person now dead. Their memories will carry through with me forever, but not you.
I don’t mourn losing you, for you are a shadow of the boy that once loved me, and I am the shadow of a girl once loved.

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